You don’t need us to tell you how much the internet and technology, in general, have changed the world over the last decade or so. Online dating has become less of a fringe practice and more one of the most common staples in finding a partner. It can be confusing to those who are looking to expand their horizons or haven’t been all that lucky in love. So here, we’re taking a look at the modern dating scene. What’s new? What’s always been the same? Let’s find out.
What not to do
First, let’s look at those ‘trusty’ old techniques that have rarely ever worked. One step to being a much better date is fixating less on why you might have been unlucky so far. Being closed off to women outside your ‘type’, for instance. Getting caught up in their measurements. Focusing on sex too much with constant innuendos and the like. A lot of these will apply all the more to online dating. Mashable.com suggests in particular that you don’t obsess over the pictures. Even people who might not seek out to misrepresent themselves will look different in the flesh. Be open. Similarly, don’t obsess over the details of what they write. Looking for the ‘right answers’ makes it harder to find what you might learn to like about them.
Appearances always matter
When we say ‘don’t obsess over pictures’ we don’t mean that you shouldn’t take your appearance seriously. For one, avoid misrepresenting yourself at all costs. Not only is it pulling the rug from under someone. It’s also a real sign of low self-confidence. Secondly, put some effort in when appearing to dates. Dress to the occasion. Think about the visual end points of where people look and put some effort in those in particular. We’re talking about grooming and accessories like shoes. Check out sites like dabestreview.com that can help you find the top-notch accessories to impress your date.
Confidence is king
Behind your appearance, the thing people want to see is confidence. Not cockiness, but they want to know that a guy will own himself. Even after a successful approach, people might play hard to get just to test that confidence. So don’t be self-deprecating. Learn to project confidence even if you don’t feel it. Fake it till you make it, as they say.
The best places to find romance
Nowadays, there’s a whole slew of different places where you can find a date. But that doesn’t mean you should go out casting your rod in every lake in the hopes of catching a fish. Find the right site or app to fit your needs. If you’re looking to have some simple fun dating, Tinder is a great way to do it. You won’t find your soulmate on the first day, but there’s no better way to jump into dating out of the blue. Other places like eHarmony are a lot more suited to the purposes of finding a partner, once dating is proving a bit tired.
Are they into you?
Dating is not a language that’s entirely set in stone. If someone tells you they like you or that they don’t like you, that puts that particular question to bed. But it’s important to learn how to read people’s body language and reactions so you’re not making a fool of yourself. Or missing a big chance. Lovepanky.com has some genuinely useful advice on spotting the signs they’re interested. Signs like real, passionate laughter and fixed attention. Following up to prior points of conversation with new contributions. Are they paying more attention elsewhere or even missing questions or points you’ve made? You can probably skip the effort of asking whether or not they want a second date.
But if they do seem like they have had a good time, by all means, ask them for that date! Following up is an important part of a good date. Especially with technology confusing things. Despite the convenience of online dating, people like to be a bit older fashioned with that kind of interaction. Show you like them. Ask them for a follow-up on the phone or even at the end of the date. If it goes really well, start talking to them online to build a quicker rapport between dates.
Hopefully, the above tips make it easier for you to catch the boy or girl of your dreams. Or at least to have a lot more confidence in your attempts. The more you try, the more you’ll get used to it. Once you’ve taken a few chances, it’s a lot less intimidating to keep trying. So keep your chin up and put your best foot forward.